she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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