I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
