i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Did I show you my penis last night?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
