i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
