Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
