it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
