That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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