i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
