She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
