I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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