And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Randomize
