it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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