i think my mom watched the whole time
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
