I think i peed on brittanys purse
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
