It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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