i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize