So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
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