theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
