remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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