3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
