Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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