i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize