Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Randomize