..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
