Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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