I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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