We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
