I'm going to jail i love you
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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