I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
