ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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