i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
