my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
