please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
