No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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