i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
