Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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