Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
