I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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