ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I currently don't understand fingers.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize