Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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