we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize