Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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