I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Randomize