My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize