my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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