ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
no more duck duck goose at the bar
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
You need a sexual gate keeper
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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