Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
do herpes really smell.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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