About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
