I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
