He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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