i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
